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Living with roommates can either be the most entertaining and fun experience, or it can be extremelyannoying.
The ladys aunt had let them live there rent-free as long as they kept the home clean.
Unfortunately, the other woman turned out to be very messy and unaware of it.
He is from the Center For Social Confidence and helps people liberate themselves from self-doubt and social anxiety.
He explained that this kind of situation is a perfect storm for resentment to build.
When that happens, its easy to start thinking, why should I keep doing this?
Why dont they care as much as I do?
But before you do that, take a moment to get clear on what you want to say.
Ask yourself: Whats the specific behavior thats bothering me?
Be as specific as possible.
Then, think about what you want to ask for.
The clearer you are, the easier itll be to communicate.
When you bring it up, keep the focus on the behavior, not the person.
Can we figure out a way to divide things more evenly?
This keeps the conversation collaborative rather than accusatory, he added.
Dr. Aziz explained that one should be ready to set boundaries.
I need us to stick to the plan we agreed on.
Its okay to let them know how their actions, or lack of action, are affecting you.
You dont have to sugarcoat it, he added.
The OP hadnt set firm boundaries with her roommate, so eventually all of her resentment came spewing out.
She told Sarahs aunt exactly why the house was unclean, and she didnt hold back on anything.
Living rent-free is a big deal, but so is your peace of mind.
Your mental health and well-being are worth it, he explained.
Sometimes, its important to be firm with people who just seem to be taking advantage of your kindness.
The OP also told folks that shed eventually be finding another place to stay.
Hopefully shed not have to shoulder the entire responsibility of managing a house despite having a roommate.
Do you think the woman handled this situation correctly by complaining to Sarahs aunt?
Let us know what you would have done if you were in her shoes.
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