Its tempting to test how committed to you your partner really is.
Actions speak louder than words, dont they?
Thats why we might turn to secret games and lying.
However, relationship experts strongly advise againsttesting your partner.
Sadly, they seldom have the desired effect.
But inventing obstacles for your partner to jump over is only going to alienate them.
Setting up tests creates unnecessary conflict, Gilbertson writes.
Although the solution may sound overly simple, the answer is almost always: communicate!
Simkins Rogers recommends asking yourself: What do you hope your test proves or disproves?
The strength of your partners love?
Their commitment to you?
Your incompatibility as a couple?
Instead of testing our partners, we should be telling them exactly what we are feeling.
Dr. Rachel Vanderbilt, the Relationship Doctor,claimsthat relationship tests only punish the person conducting them.
Whats more, they arent fair to the partner.
If youre worried about your partner, you should probably have a conversation about whats bothering you.
Testing your partner should never be the answer in a healthy relationship, Vanderbilt writes.
Marriage andcouplestherapist, Dr. Gary Brown, told Self something similar.
And if you catch yourselftesting your partner, dont be quick to judge yourself.
According to Gilbertson, testers arent bad people.
They are simply people who need understanding and support.
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