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Many people have some memories of spending time with their grandparents whilegrowing up.
Sadly, not everyone is lucky to have them in their lives.
Todays story is a perfect example of this.
The two 4-year-old girls havent spoken to their grandparents even once.
Yet, looking at the broader context suggests its more complicated than that.
No visit, phone call, no Facetime, nothing.
EveryFathers Day,the OP sends his dad a text.
And he always gets the standard responses of cool and nice.
Thats when all hell broke loose.
The typically uninvolved father decided to get involved.
He told his son that he should have texted his mom.
This made the man lose it.
Neither his father nor his mother ever wished him or his wife a happy Parents Day.
They havent even contacted their grandchildren once!
And the kids are already 4 years old; there was plenty oftimeto do that.
So, he decided not to be silent and called the father out.
He asked him why they didnt know about their grandkids.
Now, his father lost it and answered with agaslightinganswer.
He called his son rude.
Then, he added that they were just simply busy and were trying to give the couple space.
Well, 4 years is quite a long time of giving space, isnt it?
Thats what the OP thought, too.
He mentioned this fact during the fight, which led to an interesting revelation.
Or maybe deflection is a better name for it.
The father said that he and his wife constantly tell other people theyre proud of their sonsfamily.
Apparently, they can tell this to strangers but not to the family itself.
Forget about telling them theyre proud they cant even properly drop a line to the family.
The lack of communication of such feelings can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and even estrangement.
And since their son thinks it isnt enough, it leads to misunderstanding.
Perhaps there are more underlying issues under this whole relationship we simply arent aware of.
After all, it was mentioned that they never had a perfect relationship.
Or maybe, as one commenter pointed out, these parents are narcissists.
So, while its relatively unlikely, it isnt impossible.
This commenter also mentioned theDARVOtechnique.
It spells out deny, attack, and reverse victim & offender.
Typically, this manipulative reaction is applied by perpetrators of wrongdoing when theyre being held accountable for their behavior.
Kind of sounds like the father in the story, doesnt it?
Even the OP himself thought so.
On the other hand, if these grandparents are manipulative people, maybe its for the best.
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