It might be difficult saying no to yourfamilysrequests, sure.
As the title says this happened on Halloween.
Im 25M and 5 years ago my parents wanted to go to my sisters house for Halloween.
But my parents were adamant that I go with them instead because they wanted us all to be together.
And that year I was wearing an inflatable ninja costume I was really eager to have fun in.
Well I was ready and waiting in the costume for hours.
And we only went around the block, thats it.
I would have driven them home first and then gone to my friends party.
But my parents just kept drinking and refused to leave.
They just said that it was too late, and what could they do about it.
They didnt even attempt to make it up to me.
I refused to speak with them later.
Then I left before they could say anything else to me.
My friends were nearly as upset as I was.
But my sister told me off and said I was callous because she had wanted me there.
Ever since that year I only spent Halloween with friends.
This year my parents begged me to go with them to my sisters instead.
I asked why and they wanted me to drive them.
So I refused and said they just wanted a designated driver.
And theyd already screwed me over before and didnt even attempt to make it better back then.
I hung out with my friends and we had a blast with a farmyard party.
And now most of the family is pissed at me.
Ive got more details now.
And my mother is actually the one who got the DUI.
Id assumed our father.
Our mother insisted that she was ok to drive, and then ran a red light.
Thats how a cop spotted her and she was arrested.
The car was impounded and our father was escorted home by police to sleep it off.
He woke up with a raging hangover and a temper to match.
Until we all ganged up on them for what theyve been doing.
Our father fought us every step of the way.
Things are tense now.
But Im glad my sister is finally on my side in all of this.
Credits:FatNinjaThrowaway00
The clearer someone is with their boundaries, the better for everyone.
Once youve drawn a line in the sand, everyone will be aware when those boundaries are violated.
The more direct you are, the better.
This really isnt the time for vagueness.
If someone violated your boundaries, consider giving them a chance to correct their behavior.
There has to be a give-and-take dynamic in any relationship in order for it to be healthy.
Its natural to look for compromises with the people closest to you at times.
One reason why someone might do this is because they are very dependent on external validation.
In short, they base their self-worth on what others say and think about them.
There needs to be a balance between people-pleasing and authenticity.
People tend to respect authenticity and clear intentions.
However, there needs to be a healthy balance between empathy and self-expression.
Heres their perspective
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