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Many people have at least somerelationshipbaggageits natural if youve everbroken upwith someone.
In some cases, the situation gets even more confusing if your spouse co-parents with their ex.
Theres a need to balance the needs of that child with your needs as a partner.
Its something the author is incredibly uncomfortable with, and yet, her boundaries are getting ignored.
The latter is a relationship with a sole focus: doing whats best for your child.
Theyre the priority, not either of the parents.
In other words, youre expected to be respectful, cordial, and neutral.
Instead, make requests.
Helping them out with housing when theyre in a tough spot is an obvious choice.
What exactly you choose to do to help them out is where the issue lies.
Its natural to want to help others.
Human beings are hard-wired forempathy.
After all, even if youre divorced, you probably still love your child.
While all of that is very well and good, context is very important, too.
This is going to lead to a lot of tension.
Image credits:Vitaly Gariev (not the actual image)
Altruism is wonderful.
The manner in which you offer your help really does matter here!
The author of the viral story brought up a very good point.
This is a great solution because its a mature, well-meaning compromise.
The authorsboundarieswould be respected.
She and her husband would have their home to themselves.
Meanwhile, theyd still offer some direct, practical help to the mom and daughter in need.
Everyone shouldin theory!be satisfied with this.
The reality is that you cant browbeat someone into being comfortable with a situation that deeply upsets them.
Its frustrating if your home no longer feels like yours.
Even if there are no romantic feelings left there, its still an emotionally messy, confusing situation.
Or is it an arbitrary amount of time that everyone interprets slightly differently?
The former is transparent.
The latter is going to lead to even more friction.
The more clarity there is here, the better for everyone.
Being a host for a couple of months (or more) is no easy feat.
You have to consider how thats going to affect you from a practical perspective.
For example, youll be buying more food and cooking more.
Are the guests going to chip in for the groceries?
If so, how much?
Are your guests going to be pitching in with the housework?
Will they be paying for part of the rent or utilities?
There are a lot of very mundane but fundamentally important questions that need to be answered first.
Heres their perspective and the advice they offered her
A few internet users saw things very differently.
Heres how they interpreted the family drama
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