Otherwise, introducinga kidinto the mix can be an absolute nightmare.
But unfortunately, lots of people know what it feels like to be cheated on.
Infidelity can be a huge hurdle for a couple to overcome.
But even if a couple can manage to work through an affair, theyll have many obstacles to overcome.
He was kind enough to have a chat withBored Pandaand discuss how couples can move past infidelity.
It is certainly possible, the therapist says.
In this situation, the child complicates what they thought was recovery, Dr. Baucom noted.
A child is a constant reminder of the infidelity.
That can be a tall order though.
That child should not suffer because the child came from an affair.
But the rules of engagement should be a point of agreement between the spouses, Dr. Baucom says.
In this case, there is an undercurrent of hurt and anger.
I think that clouds the opportunity for deeper support.
A strong marriage works as a team, addressing challenges together.
A hurting marriage gets caught in the web of anger and resentment, the expert continued.
And that can be rationalized as justice.
But starting with the welfare of the child may help the adults come to more healthy decisions.
In other words, she has put herself in a corner that might leave her feeling helpless once again.
Here, the actual issue is an ultimatum, more than an openness to divorce.
It has become a tool of control.
Notice the disconnection, though, when she refers to the house as my house.
She is working from a you/me perspective, not a WE perspective of a strong marriage.
Pulling together is the path to a strong marriage.
The greater good of the marriage and the child has been lost.
They can choose to pivot back toward each other, or they can continue moving apart.
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