And its not necessarily parents and children.
Rifts between siblings happen, too.
What if they (or I) cant forgive?
The author of this story found himself in a similar situation.
The Redditor u/Longest-Journey had a son who wanted to reconnect.
But the OP felt that there was too much hurt and pain and found himself unable to do it.
So heaskedother netizens to weigh in.
Chapman is the author of several books, includingBrothers, Sisters, Strangers, andThe Sibling Estrangement Journal.
She offers private, one-on-one coaching sessions to those who struggle with sibling estrangement issues, as well.
And Gregory is a licensed, EMDR-certified trauma psychotherapist.
The then-pre-teen sons reaction to his parents divorce might seem overboard, but the now-adult son seeks reconciliation.
Humans have a deep need to belong, the author says.
Like these fundamentals, the human need to belong is lifelong.
Sometimes, one parent takes on the role of the main attachment figure, she explains.
Gregory emphasizes that the parent should initiate reconnection; the responsibility does not lie with the child.
But you cant just simply walk to their door and ring the bell, can you?
Fern Schumer Chapman suggests looking at the confrontation as if it was a dispute.
She suggests a strategy fromDr.
Donna Hicks, an associate at the Weatherhead Center for International Affairs at Harvard University.
Dignity, she explains, invests each of us with an inherent value and worth.
Family members can feel guilt and resentment and also choose to reconcile.
In contrast, they can forgive and choose not to reconcile.
Others might not feel an attachment to that family member.
Maybe they feel guilt or shame and need to make some changes before reconnecting.
Check out the results:
