However, the reality is often different.
Unfortunately, anxiety, stress, and frustration are common guests in households around Christmas.
Especially if youre the only one running holiday errands while your relatives are complaining all the time.
Thats exactly what redditor u/Disastrous_Rest1999 did.
Youll find the insights that Taktak shared with us below.
The holiday season is meant to be a time of peace and introspection.
So we have to be proactive in strengthening our relationships with our family and friends.
However, the key here is that these connections have to be positive.
The entire point is that supportive and nurturing relationships help us weather the stress of daily life.
That might mean (finally) enforcing some healthy boundaries after having those all-important but uncomfortable face-to-face conversations.
Boundaries arent just meant for your job or the friends in your life.
Theyre also magnificently useful in your family life, too.
Boundaries set clear expectations and ensure that our kindness and efforts arent taken advantage of.
Especially if nobody seems to be grateful for the effort you put in.
But you might not be one of them.
You may prefer a quiet dinner by a roaring fire, with only your nearest and dearest.
Canceling Christmas for a year may be a brilliant move.
Sometimes, a break from all the rush is exactly what Santa ordered.
So nobody should ignore the impact of the financial and practical aspects of the holiday season.
Its a different story altogether if someone wants to and can afford to do this.
Dr. Howard Liu, from the APA, noted that it helps if we give ourselvesself-compassionduring the holiday season.
Its OK to turn down some of those invites if they dont give us joy.
And its ok for our house to not look perfect when people come over.
For 41% of Americans, their stress levels actually increase during the holiday season.
While only 7% of people note that theyre more relaxed during this time.
Buying presents, spending time with family, listening to Mariah Carey at least 300 times a day.
Slowing down and deciding on what parts resonate most with us (if any!)
is key, Taktak explained.
So, for example, if spending time with family is important to you: focus on that.
How can you make the most of your time together?
What do you really want to express?
You dont need to go and stay with them for the entire season.
See them on Xmas day if that meets your needs!
For instance, its possible to enjoy festive food and delicious desserts without going overboard or overindulging.
On top of that, Taktak suggests reminding ourselves to look for gratitude in whats available.
How you see the world and are able to enjoy it is entirely personal.
This is your holiday and you’re able to cry if you want to!!
Taktak was also kind enough to walk us through how we can all enforce healthier boundaries.
This can be quite difficult to do.
Especially when it comes to our relatives.
Sometimes, saying no isnt so simple.
Its easy to feel pressured to say or behave in certain ways.
This may include going above and beyond, hosting and cooking huge meals for our entire family.
Have your relatives actually asked the question or are we just assuming their needs?
Do we know for certain what they would say?
If not, theres no harm in asking them a hypothetical question.
Its easier to see if we have a fundamental disagreement.
If there is one, can we raise it in a calm tone and communicate effectively?
Mom, Im sorry, Im super burnt-out and dont feel able to cook for everyone this year.
Would you mind doing it?
Or, can we just go out for a meal?
Taktak noted that its essential to be flexible and come up with alternatives for the holiday season.
Sure, tradition may be that youre used to always doing the same thing.
But can everyone be open to the possibility of trying something new?
You never know what opportunities that might create!
Getting everyone excited and curious about change can really help, he shared.
Its nothing personal, and no one has to do anything.
Everyone is just expressing their needs and together, we can find a solution.
If no solution is possible, thats OK too.
If there is an argument thats OK too.
Even if that means remodeling the relationships themselves.
He shared a few insights into what this new dynamic could look like.
Maybe we no longer invite that rude uncle or auntie who makes everyone feel down?
Maybe no one has to cook?
Creating possibility, communicating effectively, and being accepting of change are part of any relationship.
This time of year is no exception.
And that is something you never need to regret!
Heres what some other readers had to say about the situation
Thanks!
Check out the results:
