The one person who stood up for the poster in this story was her grandma.
The poster had to make the tough decision to leave their house and figure out things by herself.
She completed her education, had herdaughter, and even got a job.
She used to work as a counselor with a government ministry in Singapore.
Now, she uses her counseling skills to create workbooks and workshops for life coaches.
Shikah explained that setting boundariesis easier than we think if we have healthy self-esteem.
You have the right to choose to reply to someones messages/calls/emails or not.
Relationshipsare a two-way effort.
If someone has low self-esteem, they may find it difficult to set boundaries.
The only thing stopping the OP from going was the thought of meeting her aunt and uncle.
Amazingly enough, her grandmom decided to prioritize her comfort and safety and uninvited all thetoxicrelatives.
We askedShikahif its okay for family members to take sides like this in the case of conflict.
She said that its not necessary to take sides unless one party is clearly in the wrong.
In fact, its also perfectly fine to be neutral.
We can take a step back and understand that people have different values and different opinions.
The grandma had definitely picked her granddaughters side and did not give a hoot about other peoples opinions.
This incident also left the other family members split on who was right and who was wrong.
When family conflict escalates like this, people might feel pressured to try and keep the peace.
She added that relationships require the participation of both parties.
If one party is not keen toreconcile, there is no point in forcing the relationship to heal.
Knowing all that, Im sure the Christmas party will be awesome without them there.
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